Just As I AM!

Just As I Am-

Have you ever thought about these words? In light of things the Lord has recently helped me walk through, I have thought about these four little simple words.

I have asked God to show me who I really am. Not what my fears and frustrations show me, and not even what other people see me as, but how does God see me thru the eyes of Jesus.

You see I have had a life long struggle with always worrying about what other people thought of me. Crazy how I picked performing as my career choice. You are ALWAYS critiqued in performing. LOL

Anyways, God has really brought this issue to a head in my life over the past few months. I feel he is saying, "Kristina I want to take to a higher place of understanding spiritually, but I can't do that till you give this area fully, and completely over to me." As usual in true Kristina style I said, "sure Lord." But still kept a pinky finger on it. You know just in case he changed his mind, or just in case it hurt to much I could take it back.

Well, God basically took it completely out of my hands recently. I have had to face my fears head on, directly. It has required a good deal of soul searching and going before my savior and asking him to wash me clean of some sins and hurts.

And you know the coolest thing is, he didn't just give me a scrubbing, but also allowed me to enjoy the bubble bath along the way. Now know my skin is still a little raw from the rubbing, but I am clean. It feels good. I am everyday, minute by minute, learning to lean on him and seek his face as to who I really am. I have two saying I have come to love and at times remind myself of just to get through the day:

1. I am not defined by what someone else has done to me; I am not defined by what I have done to others; I am defined by who I am in Christ. - Beth Moore (Breaking Free)

2. Grace thinks of us in light of where we are going in God, while legalism judges us based on where weÂ’ve been or where we are right now.

Below is the devotional I received in an email recently. (note this is where I got the second saying)



Just As You Are

By John Paul Jackson

When I ordain men and women as ministers of God, I speak over them the 12-point covenant Streams Ministries and I are making with them. One of those 12 points is our commitment to grace, not legalism. Put simply, grace thinks of us in light of where we are going in God, while legalism judges us based on where we’ve been or where we are right now. The distinction is vital when it comes to being a leader at any level. It is even more important when it comes to us and our view of ourselves.

It is horrifically difficult to have a clear, honest view of ourselves. Without God’s help, it isn’t possible at all. To some extent, all of us see ourselves through a veil of legalism or one of the cousins it often travels with — guilt, fear, shame and condemnation. The roots of these often started when we were a child, and since we’ve grown up with them, sometimes we can’t even tell we have them. It’s like having a regional accent; we don’t realize we have it until we travel somewhere else and someone tells us.

The point of this month’s e-letter is this: God is committed to grace with us. This means that He will always see us in the light of Jesus’ blood — we will never be weighed on the scales alone, in the light of only ourselves. Our Father will always view us through a veil of grace, not legalism. There are no false, lying levels of guilt (2 Corinthians 7:10). There is no fear in His love (1 John 4:18). There is no shame in His arms (Romans 10:11). There is no condemnation (Romans 8:1).

So we need to stop thinking the opposite! It is a step of faith — a huge one, depending on the entangled levels we’ve been living at. But don’t be afraid anymore.

All have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God (Romans 3:23). None of us are as righteous as we need to be. God wants to move in us at greater levels, and I believe we are being asked to address issues that maybe we got away with before. We were allowed to ignore them when we were younger in our faith, but we can’t get away with them now. As Paul said, “When I was a child, I spoke as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child; but when I became a man, I put away childish things” (1 Corinthians 13:11). I believe that God is saying to many people, “You are in a place where I want to move, but you have to grow up! In order for you to grow up, this issue must be addressed in your life.”

It is time to take a step of faith and seriously take God at His word. When we’re at a place of facing — again — an issue that we don’t want to face because it’s ugly and nasty and embarrassing, we shouldn’t be ashamed. Just as it is in the good moments, when we feel like all is right with the state of our soul, God is still King now, even when we feel ugly, nasty, and embarrassing. If we don’t grasp this hope, we won’t survive long. Truly knowing God means knowing that we are loved. Just as we are. Warts and all. When we know this — truly, truly know this — legalism, condemnation, fear, shame and whatever else will not be able to attach to us — because we will know the truth, and that truth will set us free from them (John 8:32).

Isn't that awesome?

In the past few weeks,God has really put into perspective his gift of grace for me... Kristina..And I am smiling and looking forward to each new day to see what my savior will show me about myself next.

Hugs, Kristina